May 21, 2007


Grace is what brought me to Jesus. Grace is what keeps me with Jesus. Even though I may pursue Jesus it's a pretty lame pursuit compared to others and infinitely lamer than God's pursuit of me. Thankfully He comes to me where I'm at.

I am a sinner. I am aware of certain sins that plague me. I am also sure that there is sin within me that I am not aware of but God is completely aware of but does He convict me of every wicked part of my heart? If He did I think I would literally shatter. I would explode and implode all at the same time. God is holy, infinite and way too much for me and He knows it. So He feeds me truth little by little coated in love so I can swallow it. There are times that I go through the painful process of receiving conviction from God. This is good. I am usually too chicken to ask God to convict me of sin that I do not know I have. It's kind of like praying for patience. Be carefull of what you ask for, right?

Truth and Love are useless without the other yet I have come to the conclusion that love trumps truth 51 to 49. So if I know that God is patient with me and convicts me with the truth about myself in a very slow manner who am I to dump truth carelessly on someone else?... I should also be weary of thinking of myself too highly because of the fact that I believe I have found/know truth. I have learned (and am in the process of learning) that when someone puts me on the spot and asks me a direct question that demands a direct answer concerning controversial topics this sometimes means there is a deeper question underneath what they are asking. A question that reveals their heart and it's doubts, frustrations, insecurities etc. An answer that tends to the heart is the correct answer. This takes a heart like Jesus to discern.

Lord, I do not deserve life with you yet I'm pursued by you. Thank you! Could I please have some of this grace of yours so I can live like you and with you and with others.
In Jesus' name, amen


RCM- Steve said...

Beautifully written, brother. Resonated many times in my own heart.

I have often heard about the "balance" between grace & justice, from many writers and preachers. But, honestly, the last few years I've come to believe there's no balance at all. It's grace, hands down, no contesto. My most surrendered days add nothing to my righteousness, my most wicked days to my unrighteousness. I AM a sinner and will be so until I get out of this body of death. What I pray for is more LOVE, from Him to me, and from me to Him. From this comes the changes I think He wants in me. My best efforts are trash when it comes to rightness. I'm banking on grace and love.

I've been catching up on your posts tonight, and have really enjoyed reading them. Very, very good.

carl said...

Brother Steve! thanks for reading.. and for your encouraging words.